Hive Minded

I own Queen Bees and Wannabes, so naturally I was intrigued by Rosalind Wiseman's sophomoric effort, Queen Bee Moms & Kingpin Dads. I've only read through the first few chapters and I've got to tell ya - it's all a load of crap. Well, mostly. Anyone who thought adulthood meant the shedding of awkward adolescence labels and behavior needs to take off the rose colored glasses right now and venture outside of their glass house.

Wiseman's "Perfect Parent" continuum is really just a conglomeration of everyday adjectives packaged in fancy self-help speak. The usual stereotypes are all there: thin, pretty, athletic, moneyed. Ok, fine. I think my six year-old could have created this list. It's not rocket science. Wiseman's "breakthrough" is actually a lot like the science fair experiment where children indicate whether they prefer the white, blue-eyed doll with blonde hair or the black, brown-eyed doll with nappy chemically straightened hair. Nappy head, just like overweight, unkempt mom loses every time.

I liked the parent profiles and their cleverly labeled subtypes (Ann Taylor Anthology and Home Depot Demographics) but overall I found them too confining. What about the mom who works from home, who gets along fairly well with the other playground moms, but who sometimes misses a classroom party because she'd rather go to the gym alone for the first time in months?* Where is the profile for that mom, Ms. Wiseman?

Up next: Wiseman's take on youth sports and the crazies who coach and watch from the sidelines.

*After conferring with Madhubby, I was told I am a "Starbucks & Sympathy/Banker Mom." I don't normally gossip, but you'll never believe who I saw buying a pregnancy test today...