Belated Birthday Wishes

Madhubby recently asked me "So, what do you want for your birthday?" Um....yeah...that day has come and gone and, I wanted to add, if you don't know what I like after six years of marriage then where the fuck have YOU been. I didn't say any of those things. Instead, I smiled sweetly and recited the list of things I would have liked for my birthday had he thought to buy something for me:

• a bike to get rid of my jiggly postpartum ass


• a new pair of running shoes (see above)


• my favorite perfume just because a girl needs to feel pretty now and again


• a PDA since my ass squashed my old one

I don't ask for too much. Just a few things to make life a little sweeter. But, none of these things were presented to me as I rounded the corner into adulthood. Nope. I'm still stinky, disorganized and I have a fat ass. Thanks, honey. I love you, too.