Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Go Forth and Be Awesome

I do not make New Year Resolutions. I don't see the point. If I want to lose ten pounds or learn a new language, I don't need to wait until January 1st to make that commitment. I can make a resolution every day not just once per year. How cool is that?!

But last new year, January 1, 2008, there were some things I resolved to do:
  • Graduate from law school
  • Like the cat
  • Move house
None of these worked out for me. I didn't graduate from law school. Otherwise, this blog would have a different title like Diary of an Unemployed Law Mom or something equally catchy and appropriate.

I love the cat now that he and his shitbox no longer live in my house. Cats are a waste of space. Don't bother e-mailing me about the emotional and physical benefits cats provide because it does not matter to me. See, I don't have a cat anymore so I really don't care. Okay, even when I had a cat, I didn't care.

I am sure his new owners are not germophobes like me who, when the cat is laying there all furry and curled up on the sofa, can only think about the minuscule pieces of cat litter and cat poo trapped between its furry little paws. And crazy cat lovers everywhere let their cats onto their kitchen counter tops while they are preparing food that people are going to eat. That's just nasty.

And, moving? Yeah ... that didn't exactly work out either because moving is hard and I'm lazy. Just the thought of packing our family's personal belongings into individually labelled boxes - kitchen, master bedroom, laundry room - gives me hives. I actually have hives right now.

So, no 2009 resolutions. Wait ... there is one resolution I can make. In 2009: I vow to live my multifaceted and chaotic life to the fullest. You should too. Cheers!

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