Sunday, May 28, 2006

Bad Day

I am having a very bad day. I'm almost out of my happy pills so I took a smaller dose, today and I feel...unhinged. So much so that I threw my son's toy across the room because he was thisclose to tangling it up in my computer cords and smashing my beloved iBook to bits. That cannot happen. So, the toy took a flying leap and a full-on tantrum ensued.

I am having a very bad day. A day that demands I gorge myself on copious amounts of Cherry Garcia. A day where momma gets to lie in bed and hide her head beneath the blankets and just be and cry. A day where I don't want to hear big-lipped Daniel Powter sing about his bad day. A day when all the shit in my life hits me: I am budgeting-challenged; I have lost my ambition; there's never enough time/money/energy to do the things that I would like to do and - well - it sucks.

No amount of happy pills are going to change that. So. Just. Leave. Me. Be. And, for fuck's sake, make a quiet exit.